HeAvEn KnoWs

T'was a one fine day. Got some shopping before flying to Riyadh. Relaxed. Jumped from one coffee shop to another.

It was 8:36pm when i received a phone call from one of my friends. I was'nt expecting a shocking news. I was'nt ready. After all I'm enjoying my Jeddah getaway.

The bad news: One of my closest friends died on a car accident. Shocked and speechless. I sat down on the sofa. My mind stopped for few moments. The good times flashed like a scene on a movie i have watched in the past.

I cant cry. I cant believed it. I cant talk.

Tears started to fall from my eyes. I cant contain them. I don't understand. Only heaven knows. I cant ask why.

It took me an hour in such state. Then I started to call some friends to confirm the news. Believing that i could find someone who would tell me that it was just a mistake or a joke. Or that he was just severely injured but still alive. But i was failed. Everyone i talked to on the phone confirmed his untimely death on a car accident.

He is 36 years old with a wife and two kids. We've been good friends and brothers for 3 years now. He loves his job. He is a happy person. He is always a hand when I need a help. We laughed together. We cried. We jogged. All I've got now are the memories of that friendship.

My heart is crushed. I want to write every feeling that I have now. Its almost 4am and I still cant sleep. Tears are falling. Asthma attacks. Feeling cold. Unsure. Really I dont know...........ONLY HEAVEN KNOWS.

But we will be friends forever. In God's hands we know that a lifetime is not too long to leave us.

The GreAT ReWARd

Red SEA. Diving. Beach party. People. Wonderful.

It was an awesome FridAy. It was truly relaxing. Away from work. Far from any stressor.

I woke up at 6am. Excited to go to the Red Sea. Maybe because for almost five years I've never been to the beach. I miss the salty water, the waves, the wind everything about it.

We were at the meeting place at 10 minutes past 8am. Then half an hour drive. Excited. Awed. Anxious about the diving. Then finally right on the seashore of the infamous RED SEA.

The whole thing is not about the Red Sea experience. It's about the great reward for my self. I've heard one motivational speaker once said that one secret of the joy of working is learning how to reward yourself. Knowing the right reason of working is equally important to enjoying it. Many people feel condemned when they reward their selves. Why is it so? Maybe because we learned from the pasts that the reason why we are working is always because of other people. It's to provide for their needs. Only when you are free from these kind of thoughts that you’ll begin to enjoy working.

It is important to know when and how to reward yourself. I treated my self every time I accomplish something. I went to places I’ve never been. I did things I’ve never done. Invigorating. Refreshing.

I had fun today. I celebrated life. I enjoyed swimming with little Souhib. I saw people who are freely enjoying the fruit of their labor with their families.

It’s another “WOW” moment of my life….

---MoOoOoOoOoD, Mediocrity & ME---

I was once a mediocre. Living life inconsistently. Just trying everything without excelling in any of those. I quited that kind of life. I was tired. I'd stopped being just a face in the crowd. I'd like to leave a mark, a legacy, a lesson.

It was once on the pages of a book i read...that if you do something "give your 100% in it" or never do it at all. So i kept that lesson in my life...whenever i do something...I'm giving it my all. My time, my talent and my resources.

A comment on my blog today just reminded me to give my best to this thing that I love to do -writing! I was so flattered to have such comment from a complete stranger. By the way, thanks so much. You don't know how much it mean to me.

Giving my 100% to my blogs means just simply being honest with everything that I'm writing, about my feelings, and my views of the things around me. Everything goes with my mood.

I am now hearing the call for morning prayer, so it means it's a little bit late up here. It's morning. Good dAy!!!

It's Morning

Yesterday was my day off and all I did was sleeping. I was so sick. I hate it when the weather is changing.

I had a lot of complains in my life lately. Maybe it's a perfect time for me to rest, relax and think things over. Yeah....that's what I did overnight after finishing one DVD( I really love the film) and a cup of coffee.

First, leaving is not always the best mean to escape. Sometimes you just have to stay and let things fall on their right places. But im still 90% convinced that i need to leave and face new challenges in a new place with a new work and new people. But who knows, there is still 10% chance of staying. What do u think?

Second, complaining is draining. When I always complain...im beginning to lose my identity, my strenght and my vision. So I'd rather smile and take things easy.

Third, I'm sleepy. It's 8:ooam....It's morning....Good day everyone.

The RoaD

In few days, I'll be alone walking through the road we all used to take. It was the path that made us ONE, that united us with one purpose. Be it be on a warm summer sun or a feEziNg winter nights, t'was our way to a place once we called our own, our haven, the place where we built our bigger dreams....ngorzzzzz.

It has almost been 3 years since we steeped on the sands of this city in the valley. It was fun, new experiences, new people, new environment. It was insane. THe music. THe food. The fun. The pictures. The smiles. The fights. The talks. The lives we've touched and those who touched us. One thing for certain, WE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN. Some became BETTER and some BITTER.

It was a place, the place where we learned and unlearned some things in our lives. New skills. New vocabulary. New words on our lips. A totally new thing.

It was the 3 wonderful (lack of adjectives to use) years of our lives. We have to move on, fulfill our dreams, satisfy our hearts, learn new things, meet new people, travel the WORLD....Live LIFE...Be REAL.......DON't be afraid.

T.G.I.Friday's & It's mY Bday

Well, never mind how old am I, it's how many people became happy that I was born (any violent reaction?)

When you became mature and learned about the lessons of LIFE....it's not anymore about yourself...but it's more on the satisfaction by knowing that by just being you, and being there, here and everywhere...you are adding happiness to someones life. I'm thinking about LIFE lately...and I realized that it's not just about breathing( bad breath or good breath), eating (kabhsa), sleeping(&snoring), and dying. There is so much more to it. I can't enumerate them all but I can tell u one thing, that you can learn it everyday........It's the "Aha moment".

It was a big yet simple day for me. For the first half of the day, I rested. Then got up, went to the shop and buy something for myself (I surprised my self by giving my self a gift...LOL). After that, me and my bestfriend spent an hour at Starbucks. Then checked out the net for any resto that serve steak. I was disappointed to not find my favorite steak resto nearby. But my disappointment didn't took long time when my other bestfriend (I got 3 of them...BESTFRIENDS) came. He said that he wanna take us to my fav resto....ohhhh...i can't believe I'll be dining on Friday's on a Friday on my BIGday. It just opened 3 weeks ago he exclaimed. Tennessee-New York Steak plus Electric Blue so&so juice.....WOW!

Equation#1, Excellent foods+bestfriends=LIFE

I had a great time...I'm having a wonderful LIFE!!! T.G.I.W.B. (Thank God I Was Born)

BE yourSELF

Be yourself.

After work, me and my friends dropped by at a nearby supermarket to buy something. As we go over some items for [personal effects], one of my friends asked, "why this one cost this much here?", comparing a product in other shop, "do u think that the other shop sells fake items as rumored?". "Well", I said, "fake items are anywhere nowadays." That ended the conversation.

Like this products, we can fake things out. We can pretend to be who we want to be. But in the end, the real us will come out to the surface.

I hate being around [GREAT PRETENDERS]. Because maybe I'm a [what your see is what you get]-person. Why can't we be just who we are? People nowadays try to conform to the majority. Many loses their identity just trying to be accepted. Everybody have the need to belong, to be accepted. But not to a point of giving up who we are. What we do does not define who we are, who we are defines what we do. Our identity makes us unique. We can be who we are and still gain real friends who would love us unconditionally. If there are changes to be made, then be it for the better.

Being real is costly. But it satisfies even to deepest of the soul. BE yourself.